I am posting the journal entries from my sister’s CaringBridge site (http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/tracyslatoncrosson) in order to retain that documentation in our 2014 blog book. Check out the start of the series on my blog with the “My Sister” post.
Questions and Answers
By Ken Crosson — Feb 28, 2014 5:34pm
"Why did my heart stop?" Tracy always has had a knack for getting to the core of the matter at hand, and sure enough the first question she asked after getting her breathing tube out was the one we had all been puzzling over for the past few days. Well, here's the answer:
Tracy suffered a medical emergency known as a spontaneous coronary artery dissection (SCAD), a rare event that overwhelmingly affects women, and disproportionately occurs in women who've recently had babies. Basically, hormonal changes in Tracy's body temporarily weakened her blood vessels, and for no specific reason a small branch of a coronary artery ruptured on Friday, depriving a section of her heart muscle of oxygen. Unfortunately, that tiny disruption of oxygen flow in Tracy's case caused a massive response -- her heart went into a quivering arrhythmia, and stopped pumping blood to her body. (Fortunately, the link to pregnancy means that Tracy, whose baby-making career concluded, gloriously, back in November, is unlikely ever to suffer a relapse.)
As academically interesting as it is to learn the mechanism behind her incident, the real questions we needed answers to were these: Would Tracy wake up? And, if she did, would she be the same person as she was before? The last two days have provided answers in the affirmative to both of them.
Tracy's second question upon waking up was all the proof we needed that her essence remained intact: "Is Ivy hungry?" If a single word summed up Tracy's person, it would be "mom," and it is no surprise that her thoughts immediately ran to her precious baby as soon as she understood where she was. The answer to THAT question is that Ivy, like the rest of us, has been protected and provided for by the loving hands of the family and friends, including some friends we have yet to meet, with which our lives have been blessed. She's not hungry. She's happy and healthy.
Once the artery problem was explained to Tracy, her next question was whether she had caused the condition somehow by having a home birth. It appeared she didn't really understand how much time had passed since Ivy's birth, and although she knows Ivy's face and clearly has some memories of her deep inside, right now Tracy's having trouble remembering anything of the past few months. I explained that the home birth had nothing to do with her incident, but that the pregnancy itself might have contributed. She took one look at Ivy's picture and said firmly, "It was totally worth it for that baby."
There remain some questions for which only time will tell us the answers. Although Tracy is clearly still Tracy, with the same personality, sense of humor, and mannerisms as before, it is still early in the healing process and her memory and reasoning haven't completely returned. Her physical coordination is missing, and she is going to need weeks of intensive, in-patient rehabilitation before she will be able to return home, and months of therapy after that to get her back to her old form.
In the meantime, she remains in the CCU (although she will probably be transferred out to a normal ward, or the rehab ward, in a day or two), working on her coordination and other skills, and trying to enjoy as much Cran-Grape over ice pellets as she can get. For the three child deliveries she made at Kennestone, the high point was always the Cran-Grape over ice pellets, and I had a back-of-the-mind suspicion that this whole series of events might have just been a ruse of Tracy's to help her get the Cran-Grape she missed out on when we chose to have Ivy at home.
Whatever her reasons, and however long her rehabilitation will be, it's good to have her back. Her mood is terrific, and her attitude toward both her treatment and her own limitations is one of good-humored patience. There's no anger, no frustration, and not really any fear. She trusts her doctors who have gotten her so far, and believes that with God's help and the skillful hands of the medical providers entrusted with her care, she will get where she wants to go. In the meantime, she faces the challenges ahead with courage and acceptance.
And, of course, with her signature sense of humor, of which, a taste: After getting her breathing tube out and being cleared by her nurse to take fluids by mouth, she was able to have her first drink in a week. I got her a cup of her old favorite. She took a few sips, and then whispered to me, with cracked lips and a twinkle in her eye: "It was totally worth it for the Cran-Grape."
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